His head dropped back into his hands, ‘You were right. You were so right about what happened.’

My arms moved to pull Duo closer without my having to command them. Damn it; I had not wanted to be right.

‘He had another attack the night you left. It was…I…’ He stopped, working at it, and I thought I would scream in frustration.

‘We witnessed him being assaulted.’ It was Quatre’s voice, soft and low and thick with unshed tears. I looked up to watch him come into the room and kneel beside Wufei where he could speak to me without raising his voice. Trowa stood in silence in the doorway, arms folded across his chest, his eyes meeting mine for a moment before we both turned our attention to Quatre. This was where I would hear the things I wanted to hear; Quatre would not attempt to phrase things with an analytical mind, but would speak to me from the heart. I marveled that Duo was able to sleep through all this disturbance.

‘We were here, right here with him, and we couldn’t stop it.’ The tears broke and flowed freely down his face, ‘It wasn’t a dream. It happened to him, right here. All we could do was hold on to him and listen to him being…raped.’

My heart constricted at that word, that short, simple word that held so much meaning, implied so much pain. How could I protect him from something that had happened so long ago?

Wufei reached out a tentative hand and gently touched Quatre’s shoulder. Something I had not thought to ever see Chang Wufei do. These two had been through a siege together in the past few days.

‘It just went on and on. I thought it would never end. He fought…so hard. It was…brutal. His voice…was so young.’ A frown of pain crossed his pale face and I found myself reaching to touch his hand. ‘It took the both of us to hold him. Nothing we said or did got through to him.’

Wufei took up the tale, voice so soft I saw Trowa take a step into the room to hear, ‘Then he suddenly went limp, and stopped fighting us, and seemed to come out of it. He seemed all right…at first.’

Quatre choked on a sob that drew Trowa to his side, to lay a hand protectively on his shoulder. ‘He was comforting us, Heero, he held me after it was over. He kept…telling us how sorry he was we had seen it.’

Beside me, Duo stirred restlessly, and both Wufei and Quatre stiffened, their eyes snapping in his direction and they grew quiet, watching intently until he settled. That scared me as much as anything they had told me so far. They were both on such a hair trigger, their internal radar tuned to Duo’s every breath.

I met Trowa’s eyes, and he nodded, gently pulling Quatre to his feet and leading him out of the room. I turned my gaze back to Wufei, who was still watching Duo warily.

‘Don’t discount him.’ He whispered, letting his gaze shift to look after the departing pair, ‘I couldn’t have gotten through this without Quatre. He was…very perceptive that night.’

I waited for him to collect his thoughts and take up the story again; I guess I was learning patience, or maybe I just couldn’t bear hearing any more.

‘I don’t think I handled it well.’ He finally sighed, ‘Duo was…feeling pain, as though it had just happened. He claimed…he said he could see the blood. I…argued with him.’ A look of terrible self-loathing crossed his face. ‘He tried to get us to leave him alone, and I…refused.’ He was quiet for a moment, gazing at Duo. ‘I’m not sure I made the right decision.’

My fingers, still lying on the bed where I had touched Quatre’s hand, reached out and brushed his knee. ‘You did fine.’ I breathed, brushing my cheek lightly against the top of Duo’s head.

‘I’ve never seen him like that, Heero. He was…strung so tight I thought he was going to explode. But…I never dreamed he had such control. You could see him…hanging on…’ he just shook his head, unable to continue the thought, but I think I understood.

‘He was so exhausted when we put him to bed, he was in pain, and I gave him some pretty strong pain killers, he could barely turn over on his own.’ His eyes met mine in a hard look, ‘I swear, I never dreamed he would get up and sneak out like that.’

‘He what?’ I think we were finally getting to the part of the story that Wufei was afraid I was going to kill him over. The need to not raise my voice was driving me crazy.

‘I think I should have listened to him about needing to be alone.’ He looked pained again, glancing at Duo, ‘He somehow got out of the room without waking us and took off in one of the cars.’

The story was getting a little faster now that we had gotten to the part he didn’t want to have to confess to, and I found myself wishing Quatre were back to fill in some of the details.

‘He wound up at the mall. He…he called us, so we wouldn’t worry; Quatre heard something in the background and guessed where he was.’ He sighed heavily, looking at me with eyes that I noticed for the first time were as red and weary looking as Duo’s had been.

‘I drove down there. Heero, I got there before he was attacked. I could have…I didn’t…’ He dropped his head back in his hands, not able to meet my eyes anymore, and his shoulders slumped.

‘There were three of them, and one of them was injured. He seemed…I thought…’

‘Spit it out, Wufei.’ I growled, tension coiling in my gut. In the curve of my arm, Duo moaned and shifted, the hand that had been lying limp on my chest clutched convulsively at my flight suit.

Wufei jumped like he’d been shot, and his hands reached instinctively toward Duo, his face was full of dread.

I calmed my breathing and forced myself to relax, ‘Shhhhh, my little one,’ I breathed softly against the top of Duo’s head, ‘I’m here. No one can hurt you as long as I’m here. It’s all right; it’s all right now. Go to sleep. Just go back to sleep. I’ve got you.’ Duo slowly relaxed and sank deeper into slumber.

Wufei looked at me, wide eyed; and for one truly surreal moment, I thought he was going to burst into tears. Finally, voice thick, he said firmly, ‘You are not going anywhere for the foreseeable future. If you are called for any missions, I will take them. You are not leaving him again until…until this is over.’

I caught myself with my mouth hanging open and shut it. ‘Tell the rest of it, Wufei.’

He took a deep breath and kind of collected himself, ‘It seemed to me that his spirit was as wounded as his body had been. He was coming to depend on you, and doubting himself more and more all the time. When I arrived at the mall, I found the car and was waiting for him. I saw him come out, he was being pursued by three of the group who had attacked you in the park.’ He was looking off into the distance, not at me; and just getting it told. ‘I decided to let him handle it. He hadn’t seen me yet. It seemed…important.’

My breath hissed between my teeth, and I remembered my earlier desire to knock him on his ass; it had returned.

He flushed, but continued doggedly, ‘I did not know they were armed. I never would have waited had I known about the knife.’

I ground my teeth and waited.

‘He was dealing with them very quickly, very…admirably. But one of them managed a lucky punch to the side of his knee, and when he went down…the other one pulled a knife.’ His eyes sought mine again, begging me wordlessly to understand, but I couldn’t help being angry. ‘I headed in, the minute I saw it, but Duo came up and …and…he wasn’t Duo.’ He actually shuddered, ‘It was over, in an instant, he deliberately left an opening, took the slice to the abdomen in order to draw his opponent in, and then…’ The look on his face became a little awed, ‘Heero, the man was almost twice Duo’s size, but he just caught his arm and twisted and…splintered it.’

He stopped for a minute, looking down at Duo resting peacefully on my chest, as though he couldn’t reconcile the image with the one in his memory.

‘He didn’t know me. He turned on me when he heard me coming, and I thought for a minute he was going to attack me. It was like looking into the face of a stranger. He didn’t even know he’d been cut.’

‘How bad is it?’ I ventured, my fingers still, almost unconsciously, caressing Duo’s hair.

He sighed another of those frustrated sighs I had been hearing so many of in the last couple of hours, ‘Probably ten to twelve inches long, deepest at the entry point; almost a puncture, tapers off. Ended up taking seven stitches. We tried to tape it the first night and I think it would have held if he hadn’t had another nightmare. But it all pulled loose and we couldn’t deal with the bleeding until afterward.’ He slumped forward again, elbows on knees and head just hanging. ‘That was a bad night. He came out of the nightmare and there really was blood…it took us a while to get him …anchored.’

I should have stayed behind. I should have stayed with Duo and let someone else go on the damn mission. Duo had needed me and once again I had failed to be there. Whatever anger I had been harboring towards Wufei left me in one of my own miserable sighs, ‘I did not know what I was asking, when I took your oath to watch over him for me, Chang. I’m sorry. I should have been here.’

He gave me a weary, thankful look, ‘He was in such good spirits after the attack, I know that sounds odd, but I truly think I was a little bit right about him needing to handle it by himself.’ He smiled softly, eyes lost in memory, ‘He made me stop for pizza on the way home from the mall. He was so much better when we got back.’ But the smile quickly faded, ‘I think he honestly thought he had faced the demon and the demon was gone. After that second…nightmare, he became depressed. He can’t sleep more than a couple of hours at a time. We’re with him constantly and that’s making him…tense. He stopped eating.’

That explained the weight loss and the utter fatigue. It explained a lot.

‘And…bless Quatre’s heart, but he can’t say no to him about anything and keeps letting him drink caffeine for Gods sake!’

‘How bad’s the knee?’ I finally ventured, hoping this was the last of the surprises.

‘No permanent damage done, when we had to break down and take him in to have his ribs stitched up, he finally confessed that they had hurt his knee as well. The physician did not think that further surgery would be needed, but wanted him to rest it for a few days, return to the passive exercises he was doing right after the surgery for a while. He has an appointment to have it checked in…’ he looked at me blankly, ‘I’ll…I’ll have to look…I don’t know what day it is.’

‘Friday.’ I supplied with a grim smile.

He grunted, looking at Duo again, ‘I do not envy you, Yuy. He is…a hand full.’

I almost laughed, ‘Would you believe me if I told you it was more than worth it?’

A faintly melancholy expression passed over his features and he murmured, ‘I might.’

‘Why don’t you go to bed?’ I suggested, ‘You look exhausted.’

He nodded, and rose with a last glance at Duo curled in my arms, and headed for the door. Then he stopped, looking disgustedly down at the mattress on the floor and I realized that his bed was in here.

‘Use my room.’ I offered, and he gave me a grateful smile as he headed that way. Only to return a moment later, face flushed, frowning in irritation.

‘That,’ he said, pointing to the second mattress, ‘is Quatre and Trowa’s. They thought of your room first.’

And he threw himself down on the mattress on the floor without another word. If I was any judge, he was asleep within five minutes.

Well. Here we all were. What a mess; I had to get this straightened out. It wasn’t eight o’clock at night, and the entire household was in bed. Sleep was what they all needed though; Wufei and Quatre had looked completely done in. Trowa would see that Quatre was taken care of. Wufei could rest now that I was here to take over Duo’s guardianship. They would sort themselves out; all I had to do was get Duo turned around, back on the road to recovery. We had done it together once before, and we would do it again. First, he needed rest, and I would see to it that he managed that. Then he needed food; tomorrow, I would take care of that. Next, he needed to be free of these nightmares…and that was the part that defeated me. His body would heal, if he let it, but I didn’t know how to heal his spirit.

I dozed through the night, worrying at the problem, rousing when he stirred, to talk him back from the edge of the dark pit of memory.

‘Come back to me, love. Don’t leave me here. I need you. It’s all right now. I’m here…I’m with you…No one can get passed me…No one can harm you…’ An endless litany meant to bind him to me, safe and protected.

As the night wore on, he wound himself around me, arms tight around my waist, legs twined with mine, nuzzling his face into the hollow under my chin, until my body began to stir and ache with desire. It was just one more insult on top of an already trying day; I attempted to ignore it, shifting unhappily, trying to get comfortable, until I finally managed to sleep. My own dreams were fretful and somewhat erotic. I woke in the faint light of early dawn on the rising crest of my own completion, too late to stop the flood of a wringing orgasm. There was a moment of sweet release, my body finding an outlet of it’s own for pent tensions and unanswered needs. Followed by the irritating realization that I was trapped in my own mess in an already stinking flight suit. I drew a shaky breath and opened blurry eyes to find Duo staring up at me, wide eyed and puzzled. I realized his leg was thrown across my hips, pressed against my groin and he was feeling the after-twitches of my climax against his thigh. I flushed blood red clear to the roots of my hair.

I waited for him to jeer at me, but he just looked openly curious.

‘What…what just happened?’ he finally asked when all I could do was lie there and stare at him staring at my blushing face.

I think I choked. I flushed even harder, and Duo frowned, moving off me.

‘Are you Ok?’ he asked, and I realized that he wasn’t teasing me.

‘I…I just had a wet dream.’ I finally managed to sputter out.

He was raised on his elbow now, lying on his side and the frown cleared from his face.

‘Oh.’ He said, seeming to at least understand the term, ‘It almost looked like you were in pain.’

‘Oh no. Not pain at all.’ His bizarre innocence eased my discomfort a little and I stroked a finger down the curve of his cheek, and smiled lightly, trying very hard to be upfront with it. ‘I’ve missed you…very much. I fell asleep…thinking about you. That’s all.’

He looked at me for a very long time and finally whispered softly, ‘What…what’s it feel like?’

I blinked in astonishment, and he flushed a little, but doggedly waited for me to reply, ‘It’s…it’s like your body being thirsty for something…really, really hungry for it…and suddenly getting it, kind of all at once.’

I did not let him see that I wanted desperately to crawl into a hole and pull it in after me. I schooled my expression into one of calm openness and waited to see if he had any other questions.

He just grunted and rolled away to the side of the bed. ‘I’m going to go take a shower.’ It was a measure of my total loss of composure that I completely forgot that he wasn’t supposed to be walking on his knee, and let him go. When the bathroom door shut, I let my held breath out in a gust and buried my burning face in the pillow with a mortified groan.

‘How the hell do you get to be our age and not know what a wet dream is?’ asked Wufei from his mattress on the floor, and I thought I would spontaneously combust.

I had totally forgotten he was there, and it took me several long, shocked moments before I was able to lever myself up on one elbow and glare down at him.

He was lying with his arms behind his head, tangled in his sheets, staring up at the ceiling, looking much better than he had the night before.

But he didn’t look amused; he just looked sad, and I forgot my own embarrassment for a moment and really thought about the small exchange. Duo just asked me what an orgasm felt like. He had never felt…never known…I listened to the sound of the water running in the other room. No one had ever touched him in pleasure, only in pain.

‘I want,’ Wufei said softly, ‘very much, to go hurt someone.’

My heart throbbed painfully to the sound of the same drum he was hearing. I wanted to find the bastards and grind them slowly between two stones.

We lay in silence for a bit, listening to the sounds of Duo in the shower.

I finally ventured, ‘Mind if I go get cleaned up?’

He wrinkled his nose and smiled, ‘I would actually be grateful if you would go get cleaned up.’

‘Baka.’ I growled and climbed out of bed. The door to my own room was still closed, so I went in and used the shower in Wufei’s room, borrowing a robe until I had access to my own clean clothes again.

When I finished, Duo was out of the shower, sitting on his bed combing his hair, and Wufei was still sprawled on his mattress, watching him. I walked in just in time to hear Wufei say,

‘Quatre is fine, Maxwell. You dreamed he was crying, that’s all.’

I moved to the bed and settled myself behind Duo, taking the comb away from him and setting to work on the tangles. This, I had gotten rather good at.

‘It just seemed so real.’ Duo frowned, tilting his head as I stroked the comb through the length of his wet hair.

‘I suppose, if you want to check,’ Wufei smirked, ‘he is in Heero’s room with Trowa. You can go ask.’

I glanced around Duo’s shoulder, answering his smirk, ‘Like you checked on them last evening?’

I was gratified to see his faint flush; I thought perhaps he had interrupted something last night. He covered it with a grunt and a yawn and told us, ‘I’m going down to do my kata. I will see you at breakfast.’ And he rolled to his feet and was gone.

Duo’s hair was tangle free, but I spent another few minutes running the comb through it, raising it to my face and inhaling the soft scent of sandalwood. Then I went ahead and tightly plaited it for him.

‘Why does he lie to me?’ He asked abruptly, surprising me.

‘He thinks he is protecting you.’ I had to answer honestly. ‘He’s afraid of upsetting you.’

‘Then, why was Quatre crying?’ Check and mate; I sighed.

‘They came in last night, after you fell asleep to tell me about…everything.’ I flipped the end of his braid over his shoulder to signal I was finished.

‘I slept through all that?’ he caught at the braid and glanced back at me.

I chuckled, ‘Pretty much.’

‘I slept through the night.’ His tone was almost accusing.

I brushed a finger down the length of his arm and said softly, ‘And you will, every night that I’m by your side.’

‘But that means that you don’t sleep.’ He said forlornly.

‘I can sleep a little. We’re going to get through this, love.’ I entwined my fingers with his where they rested on the bed, ‘Together.’

I didn’t want to see his face clouded with this intense sadness. I wanted to bring the smile back to his sweet lips; I wanted to make him laugh. I wanted to make things all right again. I pulled him back against my chest, and tilted his face up to meet my kiss, my hand resting lightly on his vulnerable throat, feeling the pulse thunder there. I kissed him gently and deeply, not stopping until I brought a gasp from him that vibrated under my palm.

‘Now, I believe, before I left for my mission, I had arranged things so that I could baby and coddle you without interruption?’

He groaned, ‘Heero…don’t you dare start that again.’

I just chuckled evilly and climbed off the bed to sweep him up in my arms.

‘Thought I forgot you’re supposed to be staying off the leg, didn’t you?’

He glared at me, around the beginnings of a smile, ‘I had hoped.’

‘A momentary lapse.’ I assured him, ‘Now, for breakfast.’

I carried him down to the kitchen and deposited him in a chair while I hunted through the pantry and came up with a box of pancake mix.

I was going to have to find his crutches, he wasn’t that much smaller than I was, and carrying him any real distance was not going to be feasible on a long-term basis. I began mixing the batter, aware of Duo watching me in amusement. In the front foyer, I could distantly make out the sounds of Wufei, stamping and panting his way through his morning ritual; sounded like he was working with a little extra zeal.

I turned the heat on under the pan, and went to set a plate and fork in front of Duo. He sat with his chin propped on his hand and grinned at me, ‘You can cook?’

‘Of course I can cook.’ I informed him haughtily, playing the game of keeping him distracted as I poured batter, ‘Better than you can.’

‘I never claimed to be an expert chef.’ He huffed, ‘I manage to keep myself from starving.’

Almost, I retorted with something I would have regretted, looking at his gaunt features, but luckily, the first batch of pancakes finished about that time, and I dumped them on his plate and said instead, ‘Eat.’

He made a show of gingerly tasting them, as though expecting something vile, and then quirked an eyebrow at me.

‘Told you I could cook.’ I smirked.

‘Then why don’t you ever take your turn doing it?’ asked Wufei as he came into the room, towel tossed around his shoulders and looking much more relaxed than he had last evening. He sat down beside Duo, watching him wolf down pancakes with a bemused expression.

The second batch came out of the pan about then, so I plopped a plate in front of Wufei before turning back to the stove.

Trowa and Quatre wandered in, and I ended up mixing up another entire batch of batter before finally managing to eat a little breakfast of my own.

Quatre beamed at me, ‘Heero, these are delicious!’ and inwardly, I groaned; I hated cooking and had managed till now to pretty much avoid doing it. Somehow, everyone just assumed that I was no good at it. So much for that charade.

Something had been nagging at me ever since we had arrived back from the search and destroy; where was the house staff? There was usually a very competent cook in this well-appointed kitchen.

‘Quatre?’ I asked after dredging the name up, ‘Where’s Katrine?’

Quatre and Wufei exchanged a look, but before either of them could manage to say anything, Duo piped up almost brightly, without ever looking up from his breakfast,

‘I was scaring the shit out of the entire staff with my screaming and Quatre had to give them time off with pay.’

Both of his erstwhile keepers looked shocked and sputtered incoherently, but Duo stopped them again,

‘I may be psychotic, but I am not stupid, nor am I blind.’

Quatre visibly wilted and Duo took pity on him. He finally put his fork down and looked up at the blond, ‘I’m sorry, Quatre. I understand.’

‘Well,’ I interjected, attempting to divert the conversation, ‘it certainly explains why your room looks like a pig sty and smells worse.’

‘On that subject, Yuy,’ Wufei too, seemed eager to change the topic, ‘Would you mind helping me put everybody’s beds back where they belong?’

‘That is the first order of business. Laundry is the second.’ I informed him.

TBC